As it’s popularity and flamboyancy grows across the land, you may have heard of
something called “Tea Duelling”, and have been intrigued. The Temporal Entourage of
the Western Territorial Frontier Tea Duelling Association has dispatched their “Tea
Witches” out to the wilds of California, to share this elegant sport as a more civilized
way to handle heated discussions. After all, disputes are to be settled on the field of tea
in the most genteel manner.
The rules of tea dueling are relatively simple. The duel is a contest of wills between two
Each competitor is provided a cup of tea and their choice of a biscuit. The competitors
must hold the biscuit in a two-fingered hold. When instructed to dunk, the competitors
must submerge at least 50% of the biscuit in the tea for a count of five, and then pull the
biscuit out of the tea. This is where the duel begins!
The goal of tea dueling is to get a clean “nom”, in which you put the biscuit in your
mouth and bite it without having lost any pieces along the way. This sounds easy, but as
the biscuit has been submerged in hot tea, it will want to immediately fall apart,
presenting difficulty in achieving a clean “nom”.
If both duelists achieve a clean nom, the one who waited the longest before eating their
biscuit is declared the winner.